Hey, friends, happy new year! A couple quick things before we get into the first episode of 2021!
I am hitting the reset button on this podcast, moving forward with weekly episodes that will be shorter in length, around 10-20 minutes each, in an effort to explore more topics, stay on point (hahaha) and personally, challenge myself to be more focused and scheduled with this piece of my creative work.
Next, I am asking that if you enjoy this podcast, my art and the work that I do, please consider joining my Patreon group. Patreon is a platform for creators to receive financial support each month by their biggest supporters and fans, and in turn, have more freedom to keep creating, and give back to their fans. I’m proud of the work I’ve done and the direction I’m headed, and can do even more if you consider supporting me each month. Every little bit helps, and I’m always grateful for your support, no matter where it comes from. Join my Patreon.
I hope you enjoy this episode! I invite you to subscribe to the podcast, leave a rating and review on Apple podcasts so we can get into the ears of some new listeners this year. I appreciate every bit of support you give, and I’m unbelievably excited for this fresh start in 2021. Let’s do this!
LISTEN TO THE LATEST EPISODE HERE, ON SPOTIFY, Or APPLE PODCASTS:
episode 11 transcript
Welcome to a brand new episode of the Creative, Happy Life podcast! This is the first episode of the new year, and it’s good to be back!
This past week has been tumultuous, and it wouldn’t feel right not to address what’s going on in our country. Watching the events of this past week unfold has been angering and upsetting. It’s not the topic for today’s episode, but I just want to say, if you’re feeling stressed out, anxious, angry, feel the emotions you feel. Your feelings are real, and this is a lot. But do what you can to take care of yourself. Watch the news and stick to the facts. Email or write letters or call your state representatives. And then, do what you need to do to take care of yourself. If it’s too much and you can’t function dduring the day, it’s ok to turn off the news, get off social media, put on some music, do your work, make some art, spend time with your family. Do something that makes ou feel better. This is going to continue, and we need to try to not let it consume us. We can be aware, and we can take action, but we can’t forget to take care of ourselves and our people at home.
All right, getting into this episode, I’m excited you’re here! This past year was a doozy, and I didn’t record as much as I wanted to. So, my first big goal of the year is to make new episodes every week. To show up, to be messy, to stumble over my words, enjoy the process, and put it out into the world.
When I started this podcast, I was so energized, and then everything shifted last year and I was drained of any extra energy I wanted to put into make and growing this podcast. I decided going into this year that I’ll record weekly episodes, about 10-20 minutes each, with guest episodes being a bit longer.
This week I want to talk about finding enjoyment in creativity, and letting go of expectations of the desire to be perfect. We’ve discussed in previous episodes - perfect doesn’t exist - but we think that so many things have to be a certain way, or that we have an expectation of what the result of our efforts should be. And then we sometimes feel disappointed when the outcome is not what we hoped or expected.
For instance, this is a prime example, when I’m recording the podcast, I get so much into my head about my voice, my words, my inflection, if I have to pause to gather my thoughts. Then I go back and listen, and I don’t like what I said, I want to re-record, and write a script….I overthink every aspect of it instead of just doing it.
I really do love making this podcast! It’s funny, I’m sitting in my closet recording this, sitting on a little plastic stepstool from IKEA that we keep in the bathroom for the kids. The microphone is perched on a moving box, my laptop is perched on comic book boxes. I’m surrounded by sweatshirts and scarves and linens and even more boxes…it’s not by any means a “cloffice” (closet-office).
When I’m preparing to record an episode, I get so into the details of setting up and preparing, and being “ready”. And then I freeze up. I get frustrated because I’ll be in the middle of cooking dinner or in the shower, and these ideas come to me for episodes, and I think “Ugh, if only I had my microphone right here so I could record these thoughts at this very moment, I’d have an amazing episode.” And then when I do sit down to record, if it doesn’t go the way I hoped or expected, I get that feeling of disappointment.
It’s too much time in my head, instead of just sitting down and speaking freely, and enjoying the process.
As a parent, doing crafts and teaching art to our kids (or anything), it can be hard to allow them to stray. Whether it’s straying from directions…or following the directions, but then they take what they created and crumple it up and make something else, it’s like….AGHHHH what are you doing?! This happens to me a lot! I wish I could be more laid back and easy going about creativity. And this is why I wanted to discuss this topic, because there’s beauty and playfulness in the process, if you just let go of the idea of what something should be.
I’ve been thinking about this in terms of new year’s resolutions. We’re all familiar with resolutions, right? New goals,ideas, desires to change habits, create systems. We generally hit the reset button January 1st. But often, we forget our resolutions, or give up, before we even get started. If you think about it, we focus so much on the end goal, no matter what that goal may be. There are so many things we want to do, and we want to do it all on January 1st. We have the end goal in mind - cleaner house, healthier bodies, sticking to a better schedule, etc. We picture in our heads what it will be like, but we have a hard time imagining what it’ll be like getting there, along the way.
Think about the process of running. A lot of people decide they want to become a runner. If you’re a couch potato like me, you might start imagining how it feels to already be a runner. When I decide I want to be a runner, I’m picturing my already trained, healthy, stronger self who can endure running a 5K easily. What I’m not focusing on is every single day of getting to that point.
If you’re a beginner, it’s going to take time to get there, to become a runner who has endurance, and strength, and the discipline to go out there and run. But before you get started, if you’re like me, you get all up in your head. You think about how uncomfortable you might be going out to run on the road, and if people are looking at you, seeing this person who is jogging really slow, not wearing “official running gear”. I am who I am, and I worry about these things, and think about these things, if I’m going outside to do a fitness activity. How do I appear to others? I worry so much about what others think instead of focusing on my own goal and how I feel.
I think, “Is it going to be painful to become a runner?” Yes, it’s going to be uncomfortable, and maybe a little painful and sore, because you’re training your body. You can’t go 0 to 60. Maybe these thoughts, and staying in your headspace too much, causes you to stop before you even get started. Or you go for a week and think well, I tried. What’s the point?
I’ve done the Couch to 5K program so many times, I’ve started so many times, I’ve never finished it. And honestly, it’s one of the things I wish I had stuck with and finished and kept as part of my life. Who knows? Maybe I’ll start it again.
By setting a new years resolution, setting a goal, you’re saying I want to change my mindset, I want to change a habit or create a new system. But you have to do the work in order to do that. All of those things have building blocks. You can’t just do it all in a day or week. These things take time. So, instead of getting so caught up in what you expect in the end, start with step one. What is step one? Is it putting on sneakers and going outside? Is it grabbing an empty box and grabbing some clutter and trash you know can go right out into the dumpster? Is it sitting down and looking at a calendar just for tomorrow - not planning out a whole month - but just planning out tomorrow to take myself one step closer to my goal.
It’s not so much the breakdown of the goals, but…why are we doing these things? When I’m running, it’s not so much to run a 5K, it’s because I want to feel good, and healthy, and strong when I am running. I have full confidence that if I trained to be a runner, and could go out and run a race, that would be a great accomplishment. But what about the everyday aspects of being a runner, of having the self discipline to go out even when the weather isn’t great, or when I don’t feel like it…having the discipline to do it anyways. Because I know that while I’m doing it, I’m going to feel good. Or maybe I won’t feel good, but I certainly won’t regret it. Because from what I’ve heard from friends who are runners, is that you hit your stride, your momentum, and get that runner’s high. That feeling that you can just keep going. You feel good, you feel peaceful and strong. You’re in the zone. That’s what I hope for when I decide I want to run. It’s not to collect medals (although that is perfectly legit). I want my focus to be “How does it make me feel? And how do I get to that point?”
You have to start. It’s certainly not going to happen sitting on the couch. I know that I just have to start. And the same goes for my art.
When I’m dreaming up what I’m going to start making, I have a picture in my head (maybe), but that doesn’t mean that’s where I’ll end up. But I create, I paint, and I work on these things, for how it makes me feel. It makes me calm, it helps me relax, I feel good and happy and present in my body when I’m making something. It doesn’t matter if I’m painting or crocheting or baking; you know that feeling when you get in the zone doing something you love. You just feel good.
And I know that doesn’t come easily to people who feel like they’re not good at something. When I think of how I want to feel as a runner, I’m not there yet. I’m not disciplined yet, it’s not part of my routine, I don’t have the physical strength and endurance yet. I know that I’m going to feel good when I’m painting because I do it regularly. It’s part of my practice and my routine. I can get out of my head and into the creative flow.
If there’s something you want to do or try, I want to challenge you to change your mindset. Everything starts with an idea, but how do you get there. How do you get into the creative flow? How do you get to the runner’s high? How do you get to a regularly clean and decluttered house? It’s the process. It’s the process of putting paint on the canvas. It’s putting on your sneakers and stepping out the door. It’s getting out of your head and taking those limiting beliefs that say:
“I can’t. I’m not good enough. It’s going to be a chore. It’s going to be uncomfortable. It’s going to stress me out. I’m not good, I’m not good, I’m not good…”
So much of this comes back to “I’m not good” or “I can’t”, and we can do these things that we set our minds to, but it takes that first step. We can’t focus solely on the end goal. The end goal is always going to be there. But think of Anna in Frozen 2, saying “Do the next right thing.” Take one step at a time.
I’m thinking about my husband, who sat down a few times with the iPad and an Apple Pencil and he sketched and drew, and he said “I get frustrated because I have this picture in my head of what I want to draw, but then I can’t do it. I can’t make it happen.” And I say “Well, first of all, you just sat down to draw. There are so few people in this world who can just sit down and just make a masterpiece” We have these crazy expectations of ourselves and what we should be able to do with little discipline and little work. We have to do the work.
And we have to have fun with it! I think about the things I least want to do with my time: cleaning and workout out. I’m sure that is shocking to many people. But, I don’t like doing these things, especially folding and putting laundry away, or doing dishes. So, I think to myself, what can I do to make this enjoyable, and less of a chore? I put on music or a podcast. I put on something that gets me out of my head, singing or moving my body, and I make it fun!
It’s a mindset shift., I could slog through my day, doing all these things that I don’t enjoy, and say “Ugh, it was a terrible day. I had to do dishes, and laundry. I had to run errands. I had to make dinner. I had to do all this stuff." Ugh, what a horrible day.” Or, I can say “Hey, I got to listen to an audio book while I was running errands, I don’t usually have time to read, so I caught up a bit. And then I listened to some reall good jazz while I was putting dishes away, it made me feel really good. And hey, I put my laundry away and my room is clean, and I’m going to just take this moment in, before it turns back to a disaster in a couple days.”
We all have the opportunity to take something not great, and see the good side. No matter how ridiculous or pointless or silly it might seem, these little things do add up.
And if you’re worried you’re going to spend time doing something, only to give up, and feel like it’s going to be a waste of time…it is never a waste of time.
I’ve spent hours coloring pages that end up looking like crap.
I’ve spent days and weeks on crocheting projects that I’ve suddenly decided to start over. And I unravel hours and hours of work.
And I’ve learned to be ok with that, because it’s never a waste of time to do something you love, or try something new. Or working towards a goal.
It’s never a waste of time to be present in the moment.
If you find that zen zone…if you get in that creative flow…if you hit that runner’s high…if you feel happy, and playful, and joyous - all of these things add up. They add up to learning, experience, lessons. It’s always worth it.
So if you have something ahead of you, and the “why bother” thought is creeping in, let go…let go of the expectations. Try to see the lesson, or how you want it to feel. And get going. You have to leave point A, to get to point B.
And you might never reach “point B”, but there’s a lot in between A and B, and it’s all good, and it’s always worthwhile.
Start shifting your mindset.
If you’re starting to train to run and getting caught up in your head? Put on some music. Look around. Feel the earth under your feet. Notice things on your route you’ve never noticed before.
If you’re picking up a paintbrush, and a blank canvas is in front of you, and you’re already thinking you won’t make what you want, that’s fine! Make something else. See where it goes.
That’s the beauty of living. We get to see where it goes. We can plan all we want. We can dream all we want. We can make goals….and so many times, we’ll end up on a different path than we expected.
But you have to start taking those steps.
You can always change course. You can always start over. And once you learn to be ok with that, life will be so much more fun.
Become an official patron
Before you go, I want to tell you real quick about Patreon, and ask that you consider becoming a monthly supporter! Patreon is a platform for creatives to connect with their fans, receive monthly financial support from their subscribers, and get to spend more time creating and doing the work they love, and less time worrying about where their next meal or rent payment will come from. Patreon gives creatives the ability to create freely and give back to their subscribers in a variety of ways. So for $5 a month, which less than a fancy cup of coffee, you can become an official supporter and Patron of my work and the Creative, Happy Life Podcast. I have a private community where I share behind the scenes, my works in progress, I do live drawing and painting videos and chat with you and offer creative encouragement while I paint, kind of like Bob Ross. I do Q&A videos, and every month, I send you four new printable coloring pages!
I chose to set up my platform for general support and interaction, because if you’ve followed my work over the last several years, you know I am always creating, sharing, and hoping to inspire, whether it’s through my art, writing, or this podcast.
So, if my work has connected with you in some way, if you enjoy seeing my art, listening to this podcast, or my writing has inspired you, I hope you’ll consider becoming a monthly member! You can go to patreon.com/shannonsorensen to learn more and sign up! Memberships renew on the first of each month. I hope to see you in there!
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